Conversations with an Alzheimers Patient

My great grandma is one of the funniest, strongest, feisty, hard-headed, loving people I know. She also happens to have a good case of dementia, and is slowly being overtaking by Alzheimer's. While I have to remind her who I am every time I see her, she has her moments where she'll recall things from her past. Usually she remembers the trivial things, like who she's beat in Bingo and the prizes she has won. Sometimes she'll tell a story about when she lived up north - like the time the bears tapped on the bathroom window. My great grandma has quite the potty mouth, especially for an 88 year old. In her mind, it's completely acceptable to say "Bullshit" and "Hell" in normal conversation. I'm not sure she even knows what those word mean anymore.

So why am I writing about a potty-mouthed, Bingo-playing, 88 year old woman? Because this week I've had the privilege of interacting with her when the dementia and Alzheimer's had really really taken over. She's been in the hospital since Monday - the same hospital where I work. I stopped up on her floor to visit her Monday morning. My mom was there, too, and according to my grandma, the room was filled will lots of other people too. Obviously I need to have my eyes checked because I didn't see any other people - not even a nurse or a doctor. From time to time, grandma would just giggle and stare high into the ceiling.

Me: Whatcha looking at up there grandma?
Grandma: The people. Flying around my room.
Me: Hmmm what do they look like? Who are they?
Grandma: There's Anne, with pretty brown hair. And look at those birds!
Me: Hmmm I don't know anybody named Anne (mom didn't either).
Grandma: Carol (my mom), I don't like your hair. You need hair like Anne's.
Mom: Well that's not very nice to say to me. What's wrong with my hair?
Grandma: It's ugly.

A few minutes after the flying people conversation, grandma says to me, "I was wondering why Stanley never comes to visit me anymore. I found out today that he's dead. For nine years!". She laughs. A lot. Stanley was my great grandpa and she's right, he died nine years ago. Grandma LOVES her some male company. When we moved her into the senior home, she kept asking for a male roommate - there were 12 female residents so her wish wouldn't be granted. Last time she was in the hospital, she kept telling the male doctors they were good looking, telling us they just kept getting better and better looking each time they walked into her room. This hospital stay, she finds out her husband's dead and she asks for a new one. A part of me thinks she wasn't joking.

I feel so blessed to have grown up with my great grandparents and to still have one great grandma alive today. When I visit with her, I like to remind her of all the fun things we've done together throughout my life. On Monday I told her stories of how we used to pick raspberries and make home-made jam in her kitchen up north ("Oh I remember", she says). Or the time she won that big camper at the casino up north and all of us kids decided to sleep in it until great grandpa told us to watch out for bears ("Oh, I remember that too", she says). Or how she used to make us homemade pancakes in any shape we asked for, even Mickey Mouse ("Oh, yes, I remember", she says). I have a feeling she doesn't really remember but it's always fun to see a smile come across her face as I share stories of what her life used to be like before dementia and Alzheimer's invaded her memory.

Let me tell ya, if you ever have a chance to interact with an 88 year old Alzheimer's patient, I encourage you to. It will make you wonder what they see and what they think. They will make you feel imaginative, like a child again. And just when you think they are crazy, seeing flying people in their room, you might believe that just maybe there are angels visiting them instead, and that they're really not all that crazy afterall.