While chatting with some fellow co-workers today we came upon the subject of religion and then eventually that of Godparents and the role of baptism. While I understand religion is a very personal thing for most, I usually enjoy sharing my faith journey with others and hearing about what God has done in their lives. Today, I suddenly found myself in a very uncomfortable position as I was caught in a conversation with those who didn't have a relationship with God. Sitting among people who openly reject God in their lives is never easy or comfortable for me. But when our conversation turned to the role of Godparents, I found my comfort level dropping even further.
During our conversation, one person suggested that being a Godparent has nothing to do with religion or faith. In fact, she pointed out that she fulfills the role of Godmother and also happens to be an atheist. Another suggested that a Godparent is simply someone who you want to take care of your kids if something happens to you. One person shared how she was never baptized and another suggested that baptism is simply a product of the days when babies were baptized for the sake of avoiding death by the plague. As a Christian, my views on both of these subjects are quite different. In fact, these are two things that Dave and I have been discussing recently in preparation of our daughter's birth.
To us, Godparents are more than just people who we want to take care of our child if something happens to us. In fact, we see the role as quite different than that. God-forbid something were to happen to both Dave and I, the people we have chosen to be Godparents to our daughter will not be the same people who assume legal guardianship of her. Rather, we have chosen two people to be Godparents because to us, this role does in fact have everything to do with faith and religion. We want to keep the "God" part of the role at the forefront. I've had this discussion with others before and Dave and I talked about it extensively as well. Would we pick our siblings or cousins to be Godparents simply because they are family? I know many people do this but for us, we really had to look beyond that. We knew we wanted to choose people who would serve as strong examples of what it means to live a Christian life. By this, we don't mean people who simply attend church regularly or profess God as their Father. We looked at our own lives and the values we want to instill in our daughter and wanted the people we chose as Godparents to reflect those values as well. To us, these people were those who truly lived as Christian men and women on a daily basis. They are people who have encouraged us in our faith journeys and who we know will teach our daughter strong Christian values. These will be people our daughter can turn to when she may be struggling with matters of faith throughout her life. They will provide her with guidance and love in the same way that Dave and I will. The people we have chosen to fulfill this special role have shared in the joyous, special occasions in our lives. They have watched us grow and have continued to support us as Christian husband and wife. That is what a Godparent means to us. I cannot imagine simply selecting someone to fulfill this very special role in our daughter's life simply because we like them or because they share our blood.
I know people will begin to ask who we've chosen as baby's Godparents but at this time we're not able to say. We haven't actually asked either person just yet. When we do, we hope that they'll consider what we're asking of them and truly accept that role as we intend and pray that it will be in our daughter's life. I simply wanted to share my thoughts on this topic while it was on my mind today.
I'm curious what other new parents feel about the role of Godparents in their children's' lives. What do others feel the role of Godparents should be and how have they selected the people that will fulfill these roles?
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I´m not a new parent, but someday I will be! I think that this is kind of a touchy topic based on people's upbringings. In my point of view, the Godparents are people that will be positive role models in the child's life. People that will always be there for that child - not only with religious questions - but in all aspects of life. Another thing to look at, in my opinion, is their background. Who has been raised in a similar fashion and has similar views? I think that is why so many people choose siblings - they have been raised by the same parents - have the same traditions, values, and world views - for the most part.
ReplyDeleteIn the case of my brothers and me, our Godparents were all really good friends of my parents. We rarely see Michael's and David's. I wouldn't know Michael's Godparents from regular people on the street. My Godparents have been around a bit more often... but honestly I never felt connected to them. Which brings us to another reason why a lot of people choose siblings, I think. Family is family. They are always going to be in your life and in the baby's life. You never know when someone is going to move away - and often when they do, it is hard to keep in contact - unless they are family! :)